Well hey there kids…it’s another beautiful week of DVDs, Blurays, Latefees, praising and hatred of all things cinema. The world might be a strange place but being a movie nerd always keeps things light and fun around the old videostore so let’s see what new goodies will be joining the ranks of the shop this week shall we?

Back in Stock! After discovering a mysterious artifact buried beneath the Lunar surface, mankind sets off on a quest to find its origins with help from intelligent supercomputer H.A.L. 9000. “2001” is a story of evolution. … A black monolith has an affect on humans, the monolith’s effects focusing on two specific time periods.

Before the 4th film drops later next year let’s rejoin Neo and the gang on their adventures one more time.

Detective Haller and Sergeant Connor search for a murderous Hippie who returns every five years to kill again, and again, and again. Wally Koz (1988)  

Starring Jeff Bridges, Rosanna Arquette, and Andy Garcia, a detective with a tortured past tries to help a beautiful woman, entering a crime-world of prostitution and drugs to solve a murder, while resisting a return to his alcohol abuse. Hal Ashby (1986)  

Takashi Miike’s audacious horror about a widower who stages a mock audition in order to meet a new partner only to become infatuated with a woman who is not what she seems to be. Ryo Ishibashi, Eihi Shiina, 1999.  

A man realises something sinister lives inside his newly purchased home.

Ashley travels to the suburban home of the Lerners to babysit their 12-year-old son Luke during the holidays. She must soon defend herself and the young boy when unwelcome intruders announce their arrival.

Special edition blu-ray release with soundtrack of the insane gorefest masterpiece by Italian gore auteur Lucio Fulci. 1981.  

Heavy metal horror about a demon-raising band that invades a sleepy little American town. Vincent Pastore, John Fasano, 1988. 

The dead are coming back to life outside the isolated Mi’gMaq reserve of Red Crow, except for its Indigenous inhabitants who are strangely immune to the zombie plague. Jeff Barnaby, 2019. 

After creating Viktor (Clancy Brown), a reanimated man, Dr. Frankenstein (Sting) brings the freshly dead Eva (Jennifer Beals) back to life as a mate for his monster. Gorgeous Eva rejects the hideously scarred Viktor, who goes on a murderous rampage that blows up the lab. In the chaos, Frankenstein and Eva escape. Assuming Viktor is dead, Frankenstein decides to train his other creation to act like a normal human. Meanwhile, Viktor pairs with dwarf Rinaldo (David Rappaport) to form a circus act.

Legendary Bruce Campbell and Ossie Davis star as elderly Elvis and geriatric JFK, who end up in the same old age home, but the two must join forces to battle an ancient Egyptian Mummy and save the souls of their fellow residents. Don Coscarelli (2002)  

A none-too-bright criminal, Archie Moses (Adam Sandler) works for drug kingpin Frank Colton (James Caan) and remains oblivious to the fact that one of his closest buddies is actually an undercover police officer named Jack Carter (Damon Wayans). After Moses accidentally shoots Carter, the cop must recover and then bring the two-bit thug in to take the stand against Colton. With Carter and Moses on far from good terms, however, the trip does not go well.

Animated feature from acclaimed director Hayao Miyazaki, a high-flying adventure follows a pair of teenagers as they race to discover the legendary floating castle, Laputa, before it is too late.  

Sleazy 80’s updating of one of the best known delinquency films, Blackboard Jungle. Perry King, Merrie Lynn Ross, Timothy Van Patten, Roddy McDowall, Michael J Fox. 1982.  

The cast and crew of the original “Ghostbusters” discuss the making of the film.

In an England of the future, Alex (Malcolm McDowell) and his “Droogs” spend their nights getting high at the Korova Milkbar before embarking on “a little of the old ultraviolence,” while jauntily warbling “Singin’ in the Rain.” After he’s jailed for bludgeoning the Cat Lady to death, Alex submits to behavior modification technique to earn his freedom; he’s conditioned to abhor violence. Returned to the world defenseless, Alex becomes the victim of his prior victims.

Three brothers (Nathan Forrest Winters, Brian McHugh, Sam Rockwell) are trapped in an old house with three escaped killers wearing clown suits.

The night before his wedding, musician Eric Draven (Brandon Lee) and his fiancée are brutally murdered by members of a violent inner-city gang. On the anniversary of their death, Eric rises from the grave and assumes the gothic mantle of the Crow, a supernatural avenger. Tracking down the thugs responsible for the crimes and mercilessly murdering them, Eric eventually confronts head gangster Top Dollar (Michael Wincott) to complete his macabre mission.

In this provocative musical drama, an Eastern European woman goes to America with her young son, expecting it to be like a Hollywood film. Björk, Catherine Deneuve, David Morse, Lars von Trier, 2000.  

Daryl (Barret Oliver) is a normal 10-year-old boy in many ways. However, unbeknown to his foster parents and friends, Daryl is actually a government-created robot with superhuman reflexes and mental abilities. Even his name has a hidden meaning — it’s actually an acronym for Data Analyzing Robot Youth Life-form. When the organization that created him deems the “super soldier” experiment a failure and schedules Daryl to be disassembled, it is up to a few rogue scientists to help him escape.

The lone survivor of Dead Snow’s Zombie attack wakes in the hospital with his severed arm replaced with the arm of his Nazi nemesis, sparking a rampage of revenge by raising an undead army of his own. 

Oddball French action-horror about a action movie enthusiast young boy who must defend himself and his grandfather from a killer dressed as Santa Claus. Brigitte Fossey, René Manzor, 1989.  

The ultimate mausoleum of movie madness unleashing a stupefying serving of delightfully depraved and garishly gory trailer trash from the defining decade of Decadence! Erupting with almost 4 hours of a non-stop body and breast count. 

Documentary celebration of the Ed Wood Awards, an award devoted to honouring the best of the worst movies. Includes tons of bonus material.  

Starring Kurt Russell, Steve Buscemi. Snake Plissken is once again called in by the United States government to recover a potential doomsday device from Los Angeles, now an autonomous island where undesirables are deported. John Carpenter (1996)  

Russ Meyer’s cult favorite follows sadistic go-go dancers Varla (Tura Satana), Rosie (Haji) and Billie (Lori Williams) as they break free from the nightclub where they perform and race out to the desert to stir up a little mayhem. After karate expert Varla kills an innocent man, the voluptuous trio takes his girlfriend (Susan Bernard) hostage as they attempt to wheedle a hidden fortune from a misogynistic old man (Paul Trinka) and his muscle-bound, brain-damaged son (Dennis Busch).

R rated film about Santa who partners with the military in order to keep his gift-giving business afloat complicating matters is a young boy who employs the services of a hitman to take down Father Christmas. Mel Gibson, Walton Goggins, 2020. 

4 Japanese crime thriller masterpieces starring Meiko Kaji (Lady Snowblood, Stray Cat Rock) charts the vengeance of “Scorpion,” becoming an avatar of vengeance and survival. (1972/1973)  

Tale Of two movies…
Flash Gordon: A delirious space opera from super producer Dino De Laurentiis based on Alex Raymond’s beloved cartoon strip and the long running movie serial. Max von Sydow, Sam J. Jones, Topol, Melody Anderson, Ornella Muti, 1980.
Flesh Gordon: Emperor Wang (the Perverted) is leader of the planet Porno and sends his mighty “Sex Ray” towards Earth, turning everyone into sex-mad fiends. Only one man can save the Earth, football player Flesh Gordon. Howard Ziehm (1974)

After losing his job at a steel factory, Gaz (Robert Carlyle) learns that his wife wants to sue him for missed child support payments. Desperate for money, Gaz and his friend Dave (Mark Addy) decide to create their own male strip-tease act. The two friends recruit four more men, including their former foreman (Tom Wilkinson) and a security guard (Steve Huison). The group promises that their show will succeed because they are willing to go “the Full Monty”: completely naked.

Italian swastika sleaze. Cesare Canevari, Marc Loud, Daniela Poggi, Maristella Greco, 1977.  

Dark & surreal comedy about a girl who turns to her psychotic boyfriend to end the reign of the high school mean girls. Winona Ryder, Christian Slater, Richard Lehmann, 1989.  

A debauched band of exorcists face off against a powerful demon intent on destroying humanity in this 3D horror/comedy from director J.T. Petty (The Burrowers). Clancy Brown, Clifton Collins Jr., Clifton Collins Jr., Andre Royo.  

An unfaithful wife encounters the zombie of her dead lover; the demonic cenobites are pursuing him after he escaped their sadomasochistic underworld. Clive Barker (1987)  

On a snowy eve, Little Holly’s sister and father are killed by her frantic mother. Years later, Holly is married, lonely, and her life is soon about take a turn for the ultra weird, when she visits “Umbrella of Love and Mind”. Can Evrenol (2017) 

A scientifically miniaturized marine unexpectedly finds himself floating around the body of a hypochondriac, and trying to outwit saboteurs who want the device that shrank him. Attempts by his colleagues to retrieve the little man – protected inside a tiny submersible – are hampered by the would-be thieves.

The vehicle containing notorious serial killer Jack Frost collides with a hazardous chemical truck, turning Jack into a snow covered mutant and unleashing him on the unsuspecting town of Snomonton, The Snowman Capitol of the Midwest. Michael Cooney (1997) 

After being blown away by a team of FBI agents, Jason Voorhees (Kane Hodder) needs to find a way to overcome certain death. When his bloodied remains are sent to the morgue, his heart, still intact, is able to hypnotize a coroner and take over his body. After brutally dispatching a couple of FBI agents, he heads back to his favorite stomping grounds: Crystal Lake. Jason commences another teen massacre while a bounty hunter (Steven Williams) discovers the only way to kill him.

A California teen (Kim Milford) finds a laser gun and a pendant left by aliens, who watch what happens.

Original “telepics” from Syfy, the channel that brought you Sharknado and Ghost Shark featuring the inestimable Steve Guttenberg.  

For those of you who thought that A Serbian Film was all sizzle and no steak here’s a truly harrowing depiction of Serbia in the grips of a massive culture & moral decline. Mladen Djordjevic, 2010.  

Documentary on the makeup artists behind one of the most ground breaking and beloved science fiction franchise of all time, Planet of the Apes. William Conlin (2019)  

Korean period horror about a village in 14th century Korea terrorised by a beast mutated from eating the corpses of plague victims. Jong-ho Huh, 2018.  

Beloved cult director John Waters’s outrageous second feature where Lady Divine becomes enraged when her boyfriend cheats on her, and descends into a life of murder and mayhem. John Waters (1970)  

Tis The Season…

Tale in which a truck driver with a lucrative sideline in arm-wrestling takes his estranged 12-year-old son on the road after the boy’s mother falls seriously ill. The trucker is beginning to reach out to the boy as the pair head for Vegas and the arm wrestling world championships, but the lad’s wealthy, unfeeling grandfather sends his thugs to put a stop to the bonding and bring the boy back.

Long unavailable cult favorite about a tough American street fighter seeking vengeance against organized crime in L.A.’s Chinatown. Jeff Speakman, Mako, James Hong, Mariska Hargitay, 1991. 

In this gory and disturbing thriller assassins use a mind-control device which shunts the consciousness of the victim in a dark recess when taken over. Brandon Cronenberg, 2020. 

John Carpenter’s horror film about a research team who find a mysterious cylinder in a deserted church which may contain the DEVIL! Donald Pleasence, Jameson Parker, Victor Wong, Alice Cooper, 1987.  

A Troma cult classic! A mysterious fog turns grannies into ghouls who can’t wait to sink their dentures into human flesh!  

A legendary covert soldier with a mysterious past now decides to once again unleash his beast inside of him to stand up for what he cares about.

Linda Blair & Leslie Nielsen star in this spoof of the Exorcist where “no joke is too tasteless, no gag too weak.” From the director of Meatballs 4, 1990. 

After a millennium of spreading Christmas cheer, Santa Claus (Bill Goldberg) reverts to his demonic self and gives the gift of fear.

A pizza delivery girl at the end of her financial rope has to fight for her life – and her tips – when her last order of the night turns out to be high society Satanists in need of a virgin sacrifice. Chelsea Stardust (2019)  

Ghost Shark (2013) Mississippi River Sharks (2017) Ozark Sharks (2016) Santa Jaws (2018) Swamp Shark (2011) Zombie Shark (2015) Alligator Alley (2013)  

Contains: Silent Night Deadly Night 3 / Silent Night Deadly Night 4 / Silent Night Deadly Night 5 

Rival groups in a skiing school do battle on and off the piste. One gang are rich and serious, the other group are party animals. Dean Cameron, Tom Bresnahan, Patrick Labyorteaux, 1990.  

Hayao Miyazaki’s critically-acclaimed wondrous & dazzling fantasy animated masterpiece. 

A pierced and tattooed sadist, Captain Howdy (Dee Snider), trolls the Internet for naive teens, luring them to his home to torture and defile them. When Howdy kidnaps and tortures the daughter of police Detective Mike Gage (Kevin Gage), he is caught. Deemed insane, he is sent to an asylum but is released soon after, seemingly better. However, Gage knows it is only a matter of time before Howdy strikes again, and he’s ready to unleash his own form of retribution when the time comes.

An insidiously addictive, low-calorie dessert sensation takes over the minds of all who eat it in this fun cult film from B-movie master, Larry Cohen. Michael Moriarty, Paul Sorvino, 1985. 

Essential Italian horror classic, a newcomer to a prestigious ballet academy comes to realize that the school is a front for something sinister amidst a series of grisly murders. Dario Argento (1977)  

Double feature of British Horror anthology films: Tales from the Crypt / Vault of Horror. Joan Collins, Terry Thomas, Freddie Francis, Roy Ward Baker, 1973

Cult favourite about goopy, creepy alien slowly killing the inhabitants of a remote Antarctic base. Kurt Russell, Wilford Brimley, Keith David, John Carpenter, 1982.  

In the future, mankind lives in vast underground cities and free will is outlawed by means of mandatory medication that controls human emotion. But when THX 1138 (Robert Duvall) and LUH 3417 (Maggie McOmie) stop taking their meds, they wake up to the bleak reality of their own existence and fall in love with each other in the process. But love is also illegal in this Orwellian dystopia, and the act of making love has made both of them outlaws on the run from an army of robotic police.

Special edition of the gory splatter horror from Japan!  

Douglas Quaid (Arnold Schwarzenegger) is a bored construction worker in the year 2084 who dreams of visiting the colonized Mars. He visits “Rekall,” a company that plants false memories into people’s brains, in order to experience the thrill of Mars without having to travel there. But something goes wrong during the procedure; Quaid discovers that his entire life is actually a false memory and that the people who implanted it in his head now want him dead.

Low budget cult film about a series of unexplained murders which occured in Texarkana. Ben Johnson, Dawn Wells (Mary Ann of Gilligan’s Island), Charles B. Pierce (The Legend of Boggy Creek), 1976.  

4K restored version of beloved cult film about the natives of a small isolated town who defend themselves against strange underground creatures which are killing them one by one. Kevin Bacon, Fred Ward, Michael Gross, Reba McEntire, 1990. 

Thriller about a kidnapping which goes awry when a deadly black mamba snake is set loose. Klaus Kinski, Oliver Reed, Nicol Williamson, Sarah Miles, Sterling Hayden, Piers Haggard, 1981.  

Every Video Nasty critiqued and explored, followed by the original trailers, for the first time ever on DVD in America!  

Aussie thriller featuring Donald Pleasence where a down and out schoolteacher is marooned in a town full of crazy, drunk, violent men who threaten to make him just as crazy, drunk, and violent. Ted Kotcheff (1971)  

After 17 years of marriage, Barbara (Kathleen Turner) and Oliver Rose (Michael Douglas) want out. The trouble is, neither one wants to part with their opulent home. So begins a long war between husband and wife, reaching farcical heights that leave much of the house — not to mention their lives — in shambles. The couple’s children (Sean Astin, Heather Fairfield) watch in horror while lawyer Gavin D’Amato (Danny DeVito) tries his best to stem the bloodshed.

Fun-loving salesmen Richard (Jonathan Silverman) and Larry (Andrew McCarthy) are invited by their boss, Bernie (Terry Kiser), to stay the weekend at his posh beach house. Little do they know that Bernie is the perpetrator of a fraud they’ve uncovered and is arranging to have them killed. When the plan backfires and Bernie is killed instead, the buddies decide not to let a little death spoil their vacation. They pretend Bernie is still alive, leading to hijinks and corpse desecration galore.

The film stars Masashi Endō as Ace, a big fan of the Japanese rock group Guitar Wolf. After assisting the group, Guitar Wolf makes Ace his blood brother and give him a whistle to blow during times of trouble.

Hilarious Italian no budget ripoff of the De Laurentiis’ remake of King Kong. Gianfranco Parolini, 1977.

And there it is. This week’s pile of old, new and forgotten cinema crashing into the shop. Might a solid socking stuff in there. Either way see you down the road at the shop. Wash your hands, wear a mask, don’t hug people. Cheers!